React Through Clarity

One of the tools used in Deliberate Law of Attraction is the Contrast thru Clarity form.  Gaining clarity through contrast allows you to be very specific about your desire.  In other words knowing what you do not like makes it easy to choose what you do like.  You would change the radio station if a song you did not like was playing, right?  Most likely you have tried foods you really do not enjoy and know you would never order it in a restaurant. 

You create this form by writing a topic (the “Ideal Statement”) at the top of a piece of paper that you want to be clear on such as:

MY IDEAL RELATIONSHIP WITH (NAME OF PERSON)

MY IDEAL ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP

MY IDEAL FINANCIAL SITUATION

MY IDEAL  CAREER/JOB

Below the “Ideal Statement”, draw a large “T” to create two columns.  The top of the left column write “CONTRAST”.  The top of the right column write “CLARITY”.  Under CONTRAST list everything you do not want or do not like.   Think about past relationships, scenarios, or what you do not like about your past or current  job.   This gives the contrast so that what you do want becomes really  clear, the clarity side.  Now, take each CONTRAST statement one by one and ask yourself, “so, what do I want?” and write what you do want under CLARITY.  After completing 50 or more statements, fold the paper length wise and you have your ideal “desires”!   Give attention, energy and focus to these CLARITY statements in order to manifest your desire.

 I’d like to put a little twist on this to challenge you to change the way you choose to react to people.

Think of someone you have to “deal” with several times a day or week that really sends you into a negative vibration.  List all the things you perceive this person does to offend or anger you that “makes you” react negatively.

I’ll take an example of a co-worker, someone who holds the same job title as you.  We’ll call him Sam.  In your opinion Sam:

o   Is often late for work

o   Socializes for at least an hour before attending to his morning tasks

o   Usually runs over his lunch hour

o   Is on his cell phone with personal calls

o   Is late on assignments that we all are responsible for thereby putting more responsibility on ME

o   Does not contribute as much as ME and yet makes the same income, (I think he makes the same…oh please not moreL)

o   Calls in sick more than anyone else

o   Brown noses the boss every chance he gets

 “Why oh why does he continue to be employed?  Is it to aggravate ME?” 

Do you find yourself consciously LOOKING for his faults and spending a lot of time falling, falling, falling deeper into the negative zone?  If he asks you for help or simply walks by with that smile he always has, do you react in disdain, resentment, or anger?  If you had the power, you’d wipe him off the face of this earth, or at least send him to a different department – right?

What is that doing to your vibration?   Vibration levels are a way to measure our emotions and our feelings.  These vibrations extend from us and the universe picks up on what we vibrate and sends us the exact match.  This is the universal Law of Attraction.   If we are angry, the universe sends us more experiences to keep us angry.  If we are joyful and happy, more joy will be brought into our experience.

In dealing with Sam, I would guess you would be vibrating around a 2 or 3 based on a 1 to 10 scale (1 being the most negative(fear) and 10 the highest vibes of love and joy). When our energy is at 5 or lower we are easily angered, we react to others negatively.  Even “good” news cannot be enjoyed fully when we hover in the negative zone.  We judge, we condemn, we GOSSIP.  We focus on all things negative because there is less resistance.  Judging others and gossiping keeps our vibration low.  Keeping a low vibration creates negative experiences.   You actually give up your power when you allow situation or people to keep you in the negative zone.  Take it back and be in control.  Only hold a positive attitude.  You have the power to change your experiences. 

Have you ever experience a time when you were feeling down or angry and at the checkout you hear a sweet, smiling person saying “have a nice day”.  Nothing ticks us off more, right?  When you are vibrating less than 4 or 5 the resistance is too great to be happy so you respond negatively with a scowl.  If you were vibrating at 6 or above, the resistance to this sweet person who is vibrating at an 8 is more compatible and holds less resistance.  The wish sent to enjoy your day is accepted by you and perhaps even returned, “you have a nice day too!”. 

Now, getting back to Sam.  We are clear about what you do not like about Sam, but let’s turn our attention to what you do like (or at least borrow from others what they say) about Sam.

o   He’s funny

o   He has an engaging personality

o   He dresses well

o   When he does contribute, he’s really creative

o   He’s a single dad and from what I hear a great dad

o   I know he does come in on Saturday sometimes to catch up

o   Others seem to respect him as a co-worker

Keep digging deep to find more of Sam’s attributes.  Remain focused on Sam’s positives until the negatives fade away or at the least, become less noticeable.  Taking action will speed up the process.  Compliment his suit or tie.  When he participates, acknowledge his creativity.  Laugh with him and when he completes his assignment, yes even if it’s a little late, acknowledge his accomplishment.  When he arrives in the morning greet him with a smile and “good morning”.  As it turns out, he takes his kids to school and worked it out with the boss to come in a little late.  If you have a window of down time and you know he is running late with completing a project, offer to assist.

Will this be easy for you?  Probably not at first.  Habits can be hard to change and I’m thinking it’s the last thing you want to do.  Know that you are choosing to change your reaction to this person for YOUR higher good.  Raising YOUR vibration will bring you more joy, more happiness and greater positive rewards.  It’s the LAW…the Law of Attraction.  

Set your vibe in the morning stating, “I will see the good in everyone I meet today.  I will show compassion.”  Make every conscious effort to keep yourself on a higher vibration and LOCK IN so when you feel compelled to react, it will be from a place of happiness. 

What did we learn as children?  If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all.  If you need support, review your list of Sam’s positive attributes.  Although Sam becoming your new “BFF” may not be in the picture, once you begin to change your perspective,  you change your vibe by focusing on the positives resulting in a shift in the interaction between you and Sam.  An added bonus is you will feel more positive about your day and bring that positive vibe to other areas and relationships.  You may get some looks at first with the 180 degree turn in your personality but because it’s positive, the reaction from others will become positive.  If you’re dealing with a negative person and you’re LOCKED IN, they’ll either raise their vibration or contact with them will become less.

TRY THIS

We all have one or two relationships that are less than ideal.  Some may have begun on a positive note but over time have changed to a more challenging one such as with a spouse, children, extended family and friends.  We start to use words like resentful, disdain, annoying, jerk, and lazy and so on.  The smallest incident can set us plunging into the negative zone.

Can we “change” the other person to be more compatible with us?  We do not have that power.  However there is one person in all the relationships we have that we DO have the power to change.  The only one you have the power and control over is YOU.   

·         Be the parent you always wanted.

·         Be the spouse you want to share your life with.

·         Be the friend you cherish.

·         Be the mentor you wish you had.

·         Be the co-worker you like to work with.

·         Be the manager you have respect for.

·         Be the sister, brother, aunt, uncle you always wanted.

·         Be the son or daughter you’d be proud of.

·         Be the stranger you’d like to run into.

Know that the universal law of attraction will bring you the exact match of that which you send out.  If the result of any one of your relationships is less than perfect, review your part in it.  Are you being the best you can be?  Did you set and lock in your desired vibration? 

In certain relationships you can make it known that you have made a choice to only have positive, respectful conversations when a discussion is held, but not an argument.    When we lose our ability to communicate respectfully, we give control over to the other person and nothing gets resolved. 

Keep in mind to always:

·         Be respectful of ourselves

·         Be respectful of the other person

·         Be respectful and honor each other’s individuality

Keeping your vibration in the positive zone will automatically send it into the universe and what will be returned to you will be positive reactions within your relationships.  You may find yourself with your jaw opened in amazement to see your son taking out the garbage without being asked just because he wanted to help out.  Your spouse may surprise you and come home with dinner.  Your friend may buy you lunch out of the blue.  Everywhere you go, a stranger opens the door or gives up a parking space to you.  You get compliments from your boss and told you are being considered for a promotion. 

Show gratitude and appreciation to all the people in your life.  This is truly one of the most powerful tools of Deliberate Law of Attraction.  The energy that is released when we feel gratitude is felt on so many levels and is returned to us in such a grand scale.  One way is to keep a gratitude journal.  When life is less than perfect, read from past entries and you will be lifted up instantly.